Whenever I dreamt about starting my own family, my dream would be about my pregnancy and making mu husband run around to go buy all the things I would be craving for and then fast forward to running around with a toddler. Need I say that that TV lied to me about cravings. I hardly thought about how many kids I really wanted, what kind of parent I wanted to be, and everything else that comes with starting my own family. So, 2020 when I fell pregnant, I really enjoyed my pregnancy and all the feelings that came with it. This was my dream; how could I have not enjoyed it? I know that those who do not enjoy theirs do not choose not to. Even though I did not get to have the weird cravings and being picky with the food, I looked forward to a lot; just to make my husband “run around”. My focus was not to get “too fat” so that I am still able to do a lot of things for myself and yes, the baby’s health too. So I stayed pretty much active for most of my pregnancy.
Getting ready for breastfeeding
I did not bother to go and do research about breastfeeding, because like most women I thought it came naturally. The preparation I made was to buy breast pumps, an electric and a manual one and freezer breastmilk plastics. I did not buy any new clothes that would be appropriate for breastfeeding, no cover-ups that most people use. My reason for not buying the cover ups is that I am a black woman, and we grew up seeing people feeding around us and no one would cover up. So I too did not see the need. I mean who covers up their food like eating, right? One thing I must admit is that I did not realise how much society has influenced my choices when it came to breastfeeding.
The moment I have been “waiting” for
As much as I did want to meet my boy, I was enjoying having to carry him around and feeling every move that he made in my body to a point of almost not preparing myself for his birth because I felt it was “too soon”. I wanted to keep him safe a little longer. He had to be born for me to meet him, but I liked the fact that he also listened to my prayer and came a lil bit later. I gave birth to a lovely baby boy in May 2021. Then the moment I had been waiting for came. Oh, how I was so excited for the moment to bond with the most precious gift I could ever ask for. The nurse helped to bring the baby to my breast so that he could feed and well she had fewer luck with the baby latching than success. But I did not worry about it at all, he did manage to latch and suck a little bit so I was okay. The nurse who helped me was very patient, she was there for almost an hour until she was happy with the baby’s feed. I had no idea what enough was so I trusted her. This is the moment I realised that it is not as simple as I had imagined it, but it was also not so hard. She showed me what I was supposed to do and told me to try later if I wanted to but guaranteed that the baby fed enough for then.
The nurses help
I was guided by the nurses all the time when I was at the hospital, they would even check up on me to see if I was changing the breasts through the feeds. One of the nurses, I believe was a lactation specialist showed me different ways on of how to hold the baby while feeding and she helped find the position I was most comfortable with, which was a football hold. I surely didn’t know the name of the positions, I learned them later on.
From this one would swear that I had the best experience ever thereafter, but reality was yet to come!!!